Posts Tagged ‘Looks’

Loving Someone Based on Looks

So I just read the short story “Cathedral,” by Raymond Carver. It’s about a husband whose wife is best friends with a blind man. The entire story is told in the perspective of the husband and a lot of his perpective is very offensive.

At one point, he goes on about how he thinks it’s crazy that the deceased wife of the blind man lived without him knowing what she lookd like. That if it were him, he would be on his deathbed thinking how terrible it is that his spouse never knew what he looked like.

So I guess here’s what I discovered: I would like to be blind rather than deaf because visual only takes away so much of life. I believe that if I fell in love with a blind man, I would get used to the fact that he doesn’t know what I look like, but he’d know me. He would think I was beautiful in every other way.

I sort of wish we were all blind when it came to looks because the measure of a man is not based on his looks, but his personality. And people’s personalities tend to knock their looks out of the water. I have many friends that I think are the most beautiful people in the world primarily because of their characters. I know that I will remember more what someone is like, not what they look like.

We should not be defined by our appearance, but by what doesn’t seem to be evident at first glance. That’s the fun: surprise and mystery.

You get me?


Read Full Post »